Its like I cant even breathe
In a moment I actually have forgotten how.
The sudden pain in my chest is overwhelming
There is this sound in my head that wont stop ringing.
I cant keep my mind focused on anything I do
It just seems so unfair that in my life I cant have you.
I keep reaching but you dont reach back to me
The more I try the more I mess things up and become more unhappy.
I feel tortured or at least thats the way it tends to seem.
And no matter what I do being good enough is nothing more than a dream.
If there was something I knew to do surely I would find a way to get it done.
But you dont even have a clue and in your world the earth still revolves around the sun.
To you everything is as its always been.
But I can not be content with just being the friend.
I hate that my mind has labeled you Amazing and has decided to still go on this journey knowing how it would end.
Knowing that I could not let you go.
Knowing you would hurt me over and over again.
Knowing my feelings for you were out of my control.
So I take a step back.
I give you the space I feel that you lack.
I refrain myself from doing what my heart desires to do.
And that is spill my soul and tell everything to you.
In the end what good could become of it all?
When I knew my eyes had decieved me and I would eventually take this fall?