Monday, February 22, 2010

Let God Choose

"I want the white one with the leather interior and heated seats and if I cant have that one I don't really care to get another car"

I was angry when these words started pouring out of my mouth without any regards to what I was putting my parents through or what I was truly saying. I was obviously stressed and not thinking rationally acting like a spoiled teenager. I needed a new car and there was no way around that. My old blue Mustang that I had owned since I was 17 wasn't safe for me to drive anymore. I didn't have a whole lot of money and my options were growing thin but all I could think about was that I wanted that White brand new Mustang. I had called dealer after dealer in the state of Arizona and even some in New Mexico and Nevada and this was the car that caught my eye and seemed for a moment within my reach. It was a lot more than what I was willing to pay but the dealer said he would do whatever it took for me to get it. Then after running all the numbers he let me know I didn't posses enough credit to sign for it myself. I was so crushed. I didn't want to get an older car with someone Else's problems. My parents said if I really had to have it they would sign for me. It just didn't seem fair though for them to do that. My mom was trying so hard to help me out but I just couldn't see any other options. I was so frustrated that I wasn't getting what I wanted.

I looked online one night and came across a 2009 Torch red Mustang with only 7k miles. I didn't want a red car but the price was amazingly cheap and even though I was super reluctant I emailed it to my mom and went to bed. The next day she handed me the pages with the information on the car. She said if you want it you need to call and make it happen. I was still so upset but I made the call and the next day I was driving to Tempe, AZ to trade in my car for this other one. After going over all the paper work we realized I could put this car in my own name and it was over a hundred dollars less a month then what I would have paid for the White one. The dealer was willing to give me far more money for my trade in than anyone else would which was simply unheard of. This car was still under warranty and had the all the things I wanted and needed minus the leather and the seat warmers. We drove home and I didn't know what to think at first. I felt like I was settling for second best and that wasn't the kind of person that I was even if it was just a car. This wasn't at all like me. I wasn't the kind of girl who just pitched a fit for just anything but I felt so strongly that if I didn't get the car that I wouldn't be happy. This was a huge commitment and it was something I was going to have to drive for years to come.

That night when I got home it started to sink in. I really did get an amazing car even if it wasn't Brand, Brand new. Even though I thought at the moment that I wanted a white car I realized that it was really too plain of a color for me. The bright red stood out and embraced my unique personality. I wanted the leather seats and the heater warmers but I didn't actually need those things I just thought I did. This car was what I could afford and sensibly live with. God knew what I needed even though I was too stubborn at first to let Him chose for me. I remember praying and telling God how sorry I was for being so blind and so childish. D = Draft more

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When all my friends saw my car they were all blown away by its beauty and when I tell them the story of how I ended up with it they all agree that God must have worked it all out for me to be so blessed with something so wonderful. I really am blessed and every time I climb in that car I am reminded of it again and again and I feel so foolish for trying to do things my way instead of God's. Even though we aren't good God is good all the Time!

I realize how many times we do this in our lives. We want something so bad because its all we can see at the moment. Our human eyes cant see the big picture. We want to hold on tight to the things we believe are suppose to be but often we find that we are wrong. Its only when we finally start to give in and let go that we realize God has so much better things for us then what we wanted for ourselves. God wont pry our hands open He just waits until our fingers began to surrender. Its not always pleasant when God takes away our dreams and hopes and they seem like they have vanished forever but the truth its its only because He is just about to make it come true. We may think we are settling for something less but in all reality we are getting the very best. We just have to let God chose.


Mary Frances said...

OMW!!! I LOVE this Lorraine!!! It's awesome! Amen and AMEN!!! And its sooooooo TRUE!! Have you ever read, when God writes your love story?! It's REALLY good!!! Bro. Abbott taught us a really awesome lesson from it!

Lorraine M Orozco said...

Actually yes Mary I did read that book and it was soo amazing! Thanks